EDITORIALS FROM THE ARCHIVES OF THE BACHELOR'S BEAT

Nazi Way To Fix Immigration!
Dec. 28, 2007


We don’t just lose our rights all in one fell swoop! It happens one step at a time! It starts by happening to someone else! Anyone who doesn’t believe this can review the process by which Adolph Hitler took power in German over 80 years ago. He started by attacking Jews - then gypsies, homosexuals and the mentally retarded - one group at a time!
   In the U.S., illegal aliens (primarily Mexican nationals) are declared to be a problem. Some advocate that we must find a way to kick them out of the U.S. - but that would mean dividing families. Many of their children were born in this country. According to the U.S. Constitution, those kids have a birth-right and are citizens of the U.S.! They could even hold the office of President of the United States after they reach the age of 35.
   For current illegal immigrants, this is a problem - for each of them and for all of us legal citizens. We could resolve the problem in the future by amending our Constitution so that a child does not have a “birth-right” just because the mother dropped the kid on this side of the border.
   Such a Constitutional Amendment would simply declare that the newborn must be the offspring of at least one citizen of the United States of America or someone legally permitted to be in this country at the time of birth. If both the mother and father were citizens of Brazil, the kid is Brazilian!
   Next step toward our fascist Fourth Reich, is to get rid of all illegal aliens (and their descendants) and that means declaring anyone who did not enter the country via a government issued permit illegal aliens - and so are their offspring and descendants. The Nazi’s did it to anyone of Jewish ancestry - even if their families had been citizens of Germany for over 100 years. If Hitler could do it, so can we!
   This would make Bush, Cheney and all those people at Homeland Security very happy. They could then continue to follow the prescription written by the fascists in Nazi Germany and require everyone in these United States to prove their ancestry!!
   Wow!! That means one hell of a lot of people searching the genealogy records. The Mormon Church would be overwhelmed (it maintains the most sophisticated genealogy system and data base in the world). In fact many of those people are supporters of George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, and Homeland Security. What happens if we kick all those people out of the country?
   Just as the Nazis required everyone to prove that they did not have one drop of Jewish ancestry in their background, Bush-Cheney’s Homeland Security can require that everyone prove that their parents, grand parents and great grand parents actually entered the United States with the knowledge and permission of the government. If they can’t prove it, kick them and their descendants out of the country!
   Whoops! That would mean problems for a lot of people. All those Norwegians that came in via the ships up the St. Lawrence and into the Great Lakes, bypassing customs and immigration - settling in Wisconsin and Minnesota - even the ones who decided to follow Joseph Smith and his Mormon faith to Utah - whoooops, all would be declared non-citizens!
   The Native Americans (some still call them American Indians) could actually get their land back - but then they wouldn’t have anyone to play the slots and drop money in their casinos!